Million Dollar Listing 2: I Wonder If I'm the Only One Who Watches This Show
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The Reason Why You Never See Christian Bale and Kermit in the Same Room
Tue, 02 Sep 2008 19:01:00 +0000
Somebody who is extremely clever, funny, and may have too much time to waste created a hilarious post on Oh No They Didn't. It's a montage of pictures of Christian Bale juxtaposed with pictures of Kermit the Frog in the same pose! It's fantastic, and I almost fell out of my chair laughing.
noreply@blogger.com (Colette)The Long Weekend is Over
Tue, 02 Sep 2008 00:58:00 +0000
We packed. We moved. We unpacked. I woke up at 9:30 this morning, had a great breakfast cooked by J, and then I went back to bed. I slept until 4 in the afternoon! I was so exhausted from the last few weeks of packing and getting ready for the move. I needed to catch up on some much needed sleep. I feel like a whole new woman. Tomorrow is the first day of the work week, and I'm looking forward to a longer commute, where I can catch up on some reading, listen to my iPod, or just drink my iced coffee and relax. Being further up on the line means it's less crowded, and I have a better chance to grab a seat than I did before.
Our apartment is awesome. For the first time in a long time, we feel like we're home. It's roomy and sunny, and I love looking out our window and watching people walk by on the sidewalk. Before, we lived on the 4th floor, and it was overlooking an alley. There wasn't much to look at, besides the occasional pigeon or seagull. We live on a side street, and there's a lot of foot traffic, since we are only a couple minutes away from the train stop.
The bedroom is huge, and J and I no longer have to share a closet. We each have one! We're very happy here. It feels good to finally be comfortable in our home. No more stairs, no more trash truck every morning, and no more feeling as if we don't belong there. This place is everything we've ever dreamed about. And, Peter likes it too. He's always staring out the window at the people on the street, and he purrs. I don't remember the last time he purred. Maybe he finally feels at home, as well.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Disney City
Fri, 29 Aug 2008 20:55:00 +0000
Some artist took the princesses from classic Disney movies and placed them in Sin City roles. It's a cool concept, and I love artists who think of different ways of making their art interesting and creative. (Via Copyranter)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Justin Timberlake's New Clothing Line
Fri, 29 Aug 2008 03:43:00 +0000Justin Timberlake and his bff, Trace Ayala, have a new high-end clothing line called William Rast. The name is a combination of the their grandfathers' first names. Aww, how adorable! This clothing line will be selling pricey jeans, and their website has released special trailers, starring J. Tizzle as the fictional character of William Rast (oh my, this reminds me of Garth Brooks as his edgy rock star alter ego Chris Gaines). Hopefully, it won't be anything like that. We can only pray, darlings. We can only pray. (Via Ad Rants)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Today
Thu, 28 Aug 2008 18:48:00 +0000
Today is just one of those blah days where I'm tired, and I can't find anything really cool on the Internet to keep me entertained. I'm exhausted because I didn't get enough sleep last night. I'm so bad about disciplining myself to go to bed when I should. I have a lot more packing to do before the big day on Saturday. Oh, and get this shit, before I'm able to get a parking permit for our new neighborhood, I have to peel off the old one and give it back to the city parking clerk. I'm pissed off about it because we are going to be permit-less while we're trying to move, so we're going to have to keep on putting quarters in on Saturday from 8am to probably 3pm or so. I understand why they want the old one back, but I still think it's fucking stupid. Only in the city. I can't wait for the days, when we own our own place, and we have a driveway or our own parking spot. This whole parking permit bullshit is for the birds. It's aggravating.
I'm tired. Somebody get me a bed.
(Image via FFFOUND)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Passion of the Frog
Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:12:00 +0000
A crucified frog sculpture has been condemned by Pope Benedict XVI because he believes it is blasphemous. The sculpture shows a frog nailed to a cross, holding a beer in one hand and an egg in the other. They have moved the sculpture away from the entrance, but they do not want to remove it from the museum. "According to ANSA, the museum’s curators contend that the work is a self-portrait of the artist 'in a state of profound crisis' and is not an attack on religion." I can't believe this guy used a frog to depict hiimself. That's just weird. Some modern art I grasp, but art like this, goes right over my head. How do people not laugh when they see this thing?! I'm pretty sure J and I would be removed from the museum because we were rolling on the floor, holding our sides, roaring with laughter. (Via MSNBC)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Onwards and Upwards
Wed, 27 Aug 2008 16:09:00 +0000This is the last week of being in our old apartment. The place is a complete disaster right now. There are boxes everywhere, and it looks like a bomb went off in the place. We are happy to be moving, making a fresh start in a brand new apartment. I'm about 3/4 of the way done packing. I will do some more tonight. We're moving at a good pace, and I think by Friday night, Saturday morning at the latest, we will be all ready to go. It's exciting, and I can't wait to move everything into the new pad. The place is really nice, and I'm looking forward to decorating it. I think we're going to work on one room at a time. The bedroom is first. J has never liked the comforter I had picked out when we first moved to the old apartment. He said it's not made out of a comfortable material, which is funny since it's a "comforter". He said it's not soft enough for his sensitive skin. It will be fun to pick out all new bedding and curtains. We also have some great ideas for pictures we're going to hang. Although moving is a huge pain in the ass, it's worth it in the long run. We hope to be there for a while, so we might as well make it our home.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Raising the Bad
Tue, 26 Aug 2008 17:25:00 +0000
If you have seen the terrible previews on TNT for the new Steven Bochco law drama called Raising the Bar (Get it! It's a play on words because it's about lawyers!), you would've noticed Mark-Paul Gosselaar aka Zack from Saved By the Bell, in long, greasy hair and constantly looking as if he just jumped out of bed and threw on the first wrinkled buttoned-up shirt he saw crumpled on the floor. The show looks god-awful. From the previews, it seems as if they got all their dialogue from "How to Write a Law Drama 101". There's a lot of intense staring, pounding fists, and heated interactions with the characters. Also, MPG looks really out of place and way out of his league. He's not a particularly good actor. He's no Ricky Schroeder, who was actually decent in NYPD Blue. MPG is one notch above Mario Lopez and two above Dustin Diamond. And, I'm sorry, but I cannot take him seriously wearing that hairstyle. The previews looked like an SNL sketch. It made me yearn for the days of Blind Justice, which was a very short-lived show about a NYPD detective who is blinded in the line of duty, but he still continues to do his police work.
Al Norton from Two Tivos to Paradise summed it up best:I am not sure what would posses anyone to think that Mark Paul Gosselaar is series lead material; Gosselaar isn't just a run of the mill bad actor, he's so bad that Andrew Shue would watch his performance and then call Crispin Glover to say, "wow, that guy is bad." Even putting his ridiculous hairstyle aside (he looks like he is competing in a Dawson Leery look-alike contest), and ignoring that his shirts go from presentable with a tie to unbuttoned and untucked in the blink of an eye, Gosselaar is simply not a good enough actor to be front man for a TV show. He trots out just about every acting cliché in the pilot, from clenching his fists to biting his lower lip to throwing his hands in the air, all in an attempt to convey a passion for his clients and the law that simply isn't felt.
noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Mad Men: The New Girl Recap
Mon, 25 Aug 2008 14:15:00 +0000
I'm completely addicted to Mad Men lately, even more than usual. I came this close to buying a curve-hugging Calvin Klein black sweater dress yesterday because it looked like something Joan Holloway would wear. If I start smoking and drinking Old-Fashioneds at my desk, then please get me some help!
Ooh, this episode was really good! Don Draper receives a call from Bobbie who is getting trashed on martinis at Sardi's. Because Don has a weakness for women who want to jump his bones, he goes to meet her. She's there in a cocktail dress, drinking and smoking from one of those cool cigarette holders. Oh Bobbie, you're so glamorous, Dahhling! Although, I do find her annoying, I gotta give it to her in the seduction department. She reminds me of Mrs. Robinson from The Graduate.
At Sardi's, Don runs into the love of his life, and no, I'm not talking about his wife, Betty. His lovely ex-paramour Rachel Menken walks by their table with a man who turns out to be her (gasp!) husband. She looks beautiful, and Don looks as if somebody has just punched him in the balls when he sees her. He looks shocked and devastated. Good for Rachel! I'm glad she got married. What was she going to do? Waste her youth on a jackass like Don Draper who was never going to leave his wife?! She was smarter than that. And, telling him to hit the bricks was the best thing she could have possibly done. Needless to say, it is an uncomfortable moment between the two of them, and even Bobbie picks up on something. She makes some comment about how it got "cloudy in here, ". Don shrugs it off, and they have dinner and more martinis. She starts asking him what he likes, and Don just sits there like a robot (I do not feel any emotion. Beep. Beep.) You would think that would be a rather easy question, but not for Don.
Talking to him is like pulling teeth. Bobbie tells Don that she has a cottage on the shore in Stonybrook(?), and she wants him to make passionate love to her on the beach. Don can't resist sex, so he agrees. In the car, Bobbie coos how she feels so wonderful right now, and then asks Don how he feels to which he says: "I don't feel a thing." (Beep. Beep. Does not compute. What are fee-lings? Beep.)Bobbie wants to make him feel something, so she starts kissing his ear and neck while he's trying to drive. Smart move, idiot. Don closes his eyes in ecstasy, and then CRASH! Big accident, and their car flips over.
They end up at the police station. The police had found an open bottle of liquor and Don had failed the sobriety test (quelle surprise!). He's ordered to pay $150, which must've been a lot of money back then because Ken Cosgrove gets $300 a week, so that's half his weekly paycheck. Don tries to give the cop $63 and some subway tokens, but the cop is not having it. $150 tonight or Don gets to stay in the drunk tank all night. Don makes a phone call and Peggy appears in the door. She gives him $110 to bail him out, and then she has to drive Don and Bobbie. Don goes home and Bobbie has to stay with Peggy. Lucky Peggy.
Peter and his wife are having difficulty conceiving, so they go to the doctor's, and he asks Peter a lot of questions like: "How old were you when your testicles descended?" Yikes. After some uncomfortable questions and a sperm sample analysis, the Campbells discover that Peter has healthy sperm (of course he does, he fathered a kid!)Trudy becomes upset because she knows it's now her fault why they can't conceive, and Peter is a total insensitive jerkoff in the situation. Way to be sympathetic toward your wife! He ends up yelling at her, when he should be giving her a hug, and telling her it will be alright. She folds and apologizes for making such a big deal out of it. Ugh. I hope Trudy finally realizes what type of guy Peter is, and leaves him. He's so inconsiderate to her.
Joan gets engaged. Roger is jealous. There's a new girl in the office, and she's Don's new secretary, and he could care less, ha. Some guy in Accounts comes out and unzips his fly to the tune of Mozart.(It's random, but very funny.) Ken tries to make a move on the new girl. He's so smooth, ha!
And, at the end, Peggy flashes back to Don visiting her when she had just had the baby, and she was mentally incapacitated. Don tells her to move forward and forget this ever happened. He says: "Move forward and pretend it never happened. It will shock you how much it never happened, " - which speaks miles about Don and how he left his past and identity behind him. Now, it is clear why he called Peggy to come bail him out. They both have secrets on each other, and they've been there for the other. They are starting to have an interesting dynamic, and it looks as if Peggy is on her way to becoming Don's equal, whether he likes it or not.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Playboy Mad Men Photo Shoot
Sun, 24 Aug 2008 14:22:00 +0000If you are as big of a Mad Men fan as I am, then you will absolutely love these photos from Playboy's Mad Men photo shoot.
This one is my favorite. It's so vintage 60's and Vincent Kartheiser (Peter Campbell) looks so great posing with the Playboy bunnies, the white convertible, and the sleek bachelor pad behind him. I love his bad boy smirk, as if to say: "I have it all, and you don't."
There's something so fantastic about the blue and grey tones. This photo evokes a feeling of frenzied desperation, as if he's staying up all night, writing copy for an early morning meeting.
I love the dark lighting, and the fact that neither one of them are looking directly at the girls. It's as if they're at a Hollywood party in the hills, and the girls are just part of the sexy atmosphere.
noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Varla Jean, We Love You!
Thu, 21 Aug 2008 14:35:00 +0000Last night's Project Runway was fabulous, Dahhling! Their challenge was to design outfits for drag queens. How fantastic! I'm just wondering why nobody thought of this before. Hasn't there been five seasons already?! Chris March, one of last season's finalists (you may remember him designing outfits with "human" hair) came out dressed like a Viking woman with huge disco ball boobies. Once I saw him, I knew this was going to be an entertaining episode.
My favorite designs from last night were Sweetie's fiery red number and Varla Jean's pink catsuit. Sweetie looked adorable her red sequin mini dress with the detachable train, and she seemed thrilled to be wearing it. Varla Jean Merman's look was beyond amazing, and I want her to perform at my next birthday because I LOVE this drag queen. She's a 6 foot tall red-headed sex kitten(a la Ann Margret), and I absolutely adore her and all her fabulousness. Her shiny, pink nautical catsuit fit her like a glove, and she looked so good. And, I have to say her ass looked great. Color me green with envy!
Daniel needed to be auf'd. His designs were mediocre at best, and he always had some lame excuse to back them up. His drag outfit was really cheap, and it looked like something you could get at a store where strippers go to buy their costumes.
Also, if you love Project Runway and love to make fun of it even more, then check out the hilarious blog, Project Rungay.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)They Try to Make Me Go to Rehab
Wed, 20 Aug 2008 18:44:00 +0000This may be a horrible thing to laugh at, but I can't help it. Last week's Intervention featured a girl named Allison who is addicted to keyboard cleaner. In fact, she goes through about 10 cans a day. You heard me - 10 cans of keyboard cleaner every single day. Needless to say, this chick has some serious issues.
Best Week Ever via Videogum posted a montage of Allison set to the most fitting of songs. I watched it last night, and I couldn't stop laughing. I hope they serve chocolate in Hades.
noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Mad Men Recap
Tue, 19 Aug 2008 14:14:00 +0000
I watched the most recent episode of Mad Men last night when I came home from work. I have to say: it was the best episode of this season, so far. Don and Betty are going through some kind of honeymoon phase. They're all over each other! Although, it could have something to do with how hammered they are in that household. Don has little Sally making the drinks, and stiff ones at that! Whoa, did you see how much vodka was poured into Don's Bloody Mary! It's no wonder he started dancing with Betty in the middle of the living room. They got so drunk that by evening, they had forgotten to feed dinner to their kids!
Then, there's Peggy making nice with some tall, dark, and handsome priest, played by Colin Hanks. What is up with Peggy always going after the forbidden fruit? There was definitely an attraction between the two of them, until her bitchy and mean-spirited sister told him in the confessional how Peggy had seduced an "innocent" married man and had a child out of wedlock. Innocent? C'mon! She acts as if Peggy tied Peter to a chair and had her way with him, as he protested over and over. Yeah Sis, it didn't go down like that.
Betty is trying to get Don to discipline the children, but he refuses. Something told me that Don was not into reprimanding his children, especially hitting them. He had a pretty bad childhood, and his father seemed like a real jerk (see The Hobo Code episode). After a fight with Betty where she pushed him, so he pushed her back, he told her that his father used to beat him, and then he made some comment about how it made him fantasize about the day when he would kill him. Okay, hold the phone! Did Don kill his father?!! It's not clear, and Betty kind of takes it like he's just come from a bad home. She doesn't seem to focus on the whole "I may have killed my father" thing.
The American Airlines deal falls through, and I'm sure Don is pissed off at Duck (nice name!)because he was the one who made Sterling Cooper drop Mohawk Airlines and put this whole meeting together. This makes Duck look really bad. Peter was wearing teeny-tiny tennis shorts, ha. Joan's boobs looked like torpedoes under her purple sheath dress, to which little Sally Draper, who had been brought to the office by Don, made a comment that she had "big ones". Kids are so perceptive! She also asked Paul if she "lays down" with his black girlfriend. Geez, Sally is a little perv! She must've gotten that trait from her father. She's going to end up a nymphomaniac with a drinking problem who smokes 2 packs a day. Oh, and Roger had sex with a prostitute, and then took her out for a nice dinner. He's such a gentleman.
The hot priest meets Peggy after Mass, and hands her an Easter egg, and tells her to "Give it to the little one." Oh, no he didn't! Peggy is left standing there, looking stunned and really disappointed that there won't be any hope of some steamy Thorn Birds action between the two of them.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Colette on BitchBuzz: How to Deal When You're Jealous
Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:01:00 +0000
One of my latest articles for BitchBuzz is about my struggles with my obnoxious friend, her charmed life, and my intense jealousy, and how I dealt with it and moved on. I think we've all been there, one time or another.
(Via BitchBuzz)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Highlights of the Weekend
Mon, 18 Aug 2008 18:44:00 +0000
I Love Money was hilarious as always. The above is a wonderful edit job, showing Rodeo, who is batshit crazy, as the Incredible Hulk. Say what you will about VH1 reality shows, but the editing is usually really funny. (Via VH1 Blog)
The boyf and I saw Tropic Thunder, and we laughed through the whole movie. I have a silly sense of humor, so if you don't like spoofs or satires or politically incorrect subject matter, then you might want to skip this one. Robert Downey Jr. was so good. I was blown away. Tom Cruise has a fantastic cameo. J thought he stole the show. I thought he was good. It's a fun summer movie, and if you want a great comedy to see, then this is the perfect movie. Slate's review of the movie was the best I've read. (Via Slate)
I locked myself out of our coat closet on Saturday night. J had to break the lock with a hammer. Who puts a lock on a frigging closet door!!?? It was a heavy duty one, to boot. We tried everything to unlock it: credit cards, cosmetic scissors, screws, etc. Now, we have to buy a new doorknob and replace it before we move out. Oops!
I got a lot of packing done for the big move, and we donated our stuff to Goodwill. I also bought some new pants for work because lately, my old size isn't fitting as well as it should be WTF!!! I got a great deal at The Express for 2 pairs of pants for the price of one. Yay!noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Colette on BitchBuzz: Online Dating 101
Fri, 15 Aug 2008 17:28:00 +0000
Some idiot in Marie-Claire wrote an article about how she dated a guy online for two years. I wrote an article for BitchBuzz in response. The best part is she never met him - ever. Two years! She said she had a fear of intimacy and so did he, ha! However, his fear of intimacy didn't seem to keep him from dating one of her friends. Yeah, he had a fear of intimacy.
(Via BitchBuzz)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Burnt Out
Fri, 15 Aug 2008 16:13:00 +0000
I woke up this morning and could not for the life of me get up and get ready for work. I'm exhausted this week. I've been staying up too late, watching the Olympics or writing articles for BitchBuzz. I need to chill this weekend and take lots of naps and eat some yummy take-out with the boyf.
I have to do some packing for the move, and I'm also donating a ton of clothes that have been hanging in my closet for a long time. There are some clothes I haven't worn in years, and/or I don't fit into anymore. They are going to a good home. J and I are donating our stuff to Big Brothers Society. All the clothes are in great condition, and I hope somebody less fortunate enjoys them as much as I did. I also gave away a lot of my "you're in your 30's now, you can't wear a bedazzled 'Princess' half-shirt" shirts. It's all about being age appropriate. Those clothes had a good run. I might even go through my "club clothes" this weekend. I have a whole crate of them in my closet, and I'm pretty sure they're covered in a blanket of cat hair because Peter used to sleep on top of them. I might keep some of those clothes, just because they're so damn cool, and I don't want to lose them. And, because I like shiny, sparkly things. I'm simple.
I hope everybody has a good weekend.
*Also, if you're reading BitchBuzz, comments are enabled, so please feel free to leave comments! Tell us how you feel about something! If you disagree with an article, then we want to hear about it.noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Big Things...
Wed, 13 Aug 2008 17:36:00 +0000
I am working on a few things for BitchBuzz right now, and I can't tell you how excited I am! I have two big interviews in the works with some wonderful and creative peeps. I don't want to give away too much. Look for them in the coming weeks...noreply@blogger.com (Colette)Colette on BitchBuzz: Relationship Rituals Exposed!
Tue, 12 Aug 2008 18:10:00 +0000
This is an article where I take really shitty women's advice from Glamour (quelle surprise!) and expose the truth. Will these relationship rituals spice up your love life? I'm going with "No way."
(Via BitchBuzz)noreply@blogger.com (Colette)5 Cringe-Worthy Corporate Songs
Tue, 12 Aug 2008 16:38:00 +0000
I came across this article in Holy Taco last night, and I was giggling so much that J wanted to know what the hell I was looking at!
My favorite is Mindshare's version of Donna Summer's "She Works Hard For The Money" and turning it into "We Work Hard For Your Money". The worst part about it, besides the song choice, is the video features a bunch of their employees singing this diddy "We Are The World" style. How many employees quit that day, I wonder?
http://view.break.com/552601 - Watch more free videosnoreply@blogger.com (Colette)
A Pop Culture Whore's Vapid and Tawdry Existence
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